Free live workshop — June 17th
Free live workshop — June 17th
Dutch. In Milan.
At the threshold
for 25 years.
Certified HypnoBirthing Practitioner — Marie Mongan Method
Generational Trauma Coach — 25 years of study and practice
Birth Doula — Milan & surrounding areas, homebirths
Board Member — GALATI(CA) DOULA, Florence
English-speaking expat specialist — Milan, Italy
“The heaviest thing in the birth room is not the pain. It is what you carry from your family.”
— Margaretha Tosi
The story that
built everything
25
years of work at this threshold
When I was five years old I learned to read a room before I entered it.
I would come home from school — sometimes happy, sometimes full of something I wanted to share — and I would stop at the back door of our house. I would grab the handle. And sense.
The atmosphere. The tension between my parents. The particular quality of silence that told me everything I needed to know about what to do before I even walked in.
I would adjust. I put the joy away. Made myself smaller. Calibrated to whatever the room needed.
That same year my parents divorced. We moved to a new house. And I broke my leg. Two months in a hospital, alone, at five years old — at the exact moment when every anchor of safety I had was already disappearing.
I’m also a Dutch woman married to an Italian, raising a family in a country that isn’t mine. I know exactly what it’s like to build a family far from your people — and why that makes this work even more essential.
“I lost every anchor simultaneously. The family. The home. My body’s reliability. The sense that the ground beneath me would hold.”
I rebuilt myself around a new understanding of the world. Safety is not guaranteed. Joy needs to be hidden to survive. Read the room. Adapt. Blend.
What I did not know until much later was that this experience had also given me something extraordinary — the ability to sense what is happening beneath the surface of things. In a room, in a relationship, between two people who are not in alignment.
At twenty-five I found myself in a relationship that looked, from the outside, completely fine. We lived together. We functioned. There was no love. Not the kind that reaches.
I had recreated my parents’ marriage exactly. Without choosing it. Because I had never looked at the root of it.
That breakdown at twenty-five was the beginning of everything I do now. Twenty-five years of studying generational trauma. Hundreds of birth rooms. Hundreds of couples carrying their families into the most significant moment of their lives without knowing it.
The M. Sanctuary exists because of that door handle. Because of what I carried. And what I finally chose to put down.
25 years at the intersection
of birth and lineage
Every experience — professional and personal — has shaped
the work that exists today.
A Dutch childhood that would become the foundation for understanding what it means to build a life — and a family — far from where you began.
The convictions that
shape every session
These are not theories. They come from 25 years of standing at the threshold with couples.
01
What you carry across it — your child’s nervous system registers. This is not a metaphor. It is a physiological reality that shapes the earliest days of a new life.
02
Both partners carry a lineage. Both are full participants in this preparation. A partner who has done his own work changes the entire atmosphere of the birth room.
03
The body holds what the mind explains away
Understanding a pattern intellectually is not the same as releasing it somatically. The deepest work happens below thought — in the nervous system, in the breath, in the body’s memory.
Sovereignty is not control
05
06
Three approaches.
One integrated framework.
The work draws on three distinct bodies of knowledge — not because more is better, but because each reaches a layer the others cannot.
Family
Systems
work
— understanding the patterns, loyalties, and unspoken rules that travel through family lines across generations. Making the invisible visible.
— locating inherited patterns in the body and releasing them at the level where they actually live. Not thinking your way through it — feeling your way through it.
Hypno-
Birthing
— the specific techniques, breathwork, and nervous system preparation that make the birth experience itself profoundly different. The practical layer that rests on a cleared foundation.
What makes this framework unique is not any single approach — it is the integration of all three, applied specifically to the perinatal window, for both partners simultaneously.
Dutch roots.
Italian life.
One daughter.
I have lived in Milan for over twenty years. I am married to an Italian. I have built my family, my practice, and my life in a country that was not mine to begin with — and I understand, from the inside, what that requires of a person.
I know what it means to navigate Italian hospitals in a language not quite your own. To build your village from scratch when your family is four countries away. To make decisions about your body and your birth without your mother in the next room.
Milan, Italy — working in person and online across Europe
The couples I work best with
Building a family far from home, navigating an Italian medical system in a language not their own, without their village nearby. This work was built for you.
Not yet pregnant but ready to prepare in the way that actually matters. The most powerful window for this work — before the urgency of pregnancy arrives.
Therapy has helped. Something still remains. The anxiety without a rational source. The fear that traces back further than this pregnancy. This is exactly the layer we work at.
Both partners ready to examine their own lineage. Both willing to arrive at birth having done the work — not as individuals hoping for the best, but as a genuine team.
Already a parent. Already seeing the old patterns surface. The promises you made to yourself beginning to feel impossibly hard to keep. It is not too late for this work.
Choosing a birth outside the hospital system. Wanting the preparation to match the depth of that choice. Sovereign, grounded, and genuinely ready.
Ready to find out if this
work is right for you?
A 30-minute discovery call is free, without obligation, and the best place to start. We talk about where you are, what you are carrying, and whether this work fits your situation.